Reading: Alison Weir, Eleanor of Aquitaine

Moving: 30' elliptical with two 2-lb handweights, Deadicated, average heart rate 163; plus a full weight circuit.

Viewing: "Lolita"

Listening: RDC gripe about the Fedex dude.

Learning: The Latin for broom flower is planta genista

25 February 2000: RDC returns to the fold

Confidential to Andrew S.: I've tried to respond to you twice now, but my mail bounces. I cannot send to the address you wrote from.

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When I came home last night, RDC was grinning that grin he grinned when RRP and I came home from shopping for my bridal shoes and I could tell by the way he waved to us in the doorway that his own separate shopping expedition for a stereo had been excessively successful. He was grinning the grin that he grinned when he wouldn't tell me he what he bought me for Christmas (every year since we've known each other).

Last night on the phone, I had asked him if he would respect me in the morning if I bought something from QVC. Channel-hopping, which I obviously do a lot of (I say I mute commercials, and I do, but I surf through the whole band--the whole muted band--regularly). Anyway, during one such run after "ER" Thursday night, I saw iolite jewerly on QVC. A solitary faceted iolite in a simple silver band. I actually wrote the order number. Then I collected myself: QVC is to shopping as televangelism is to religion, QVC's merchandise has been reported as shoddy and its descriptions misleading, and it's just tacky. I bought a Topsy-Tail, I admit, but I bought it in an accessory store in an actual mall, so there.

I called RDC and told him how my right hand flails weightlessly unadorned with silver semi-precious stones; my bracelets are the only thing that keep that hand earthbound. He's been wanting to buy me what he calls real jewelry for a long time. He knows I'd like "real" jewelry about as much as I liked how I looked at Glamour Shots, except that I would like tanzanite studs. I already know what my birthday present is: to have my engagement ring and wedding band reset in white white gold, instead of this alloy that looks like the new dollar coin. When I saw the grin, I, with my fluttering right hand, thought he might have gotten me a present.

And he did. The desktop system he bought is a Macintosh, not a PC. Whew.

I'm actually writing this Saturday morning, and RDC has been griping about the Fedex dude (left-hand column reference) because, having made the decision yesterday (hence the bouncing when I got home), he wanted the computer now. Almost as soon as he woke up, he began to pout. "I thought the Fedex guy was supposed to come at night, down the chimney, while you sleep." He paused. "Wouldn't that be a great business model for them?"

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I thought of another favorite movie scene: when Christina Ricci smiles in "Addams Family Values." As brilliantly as those movies are cast, neither is watchable; the second is even less watchable than the first. Except for Wednesday trying to smile and be perky at camp. It's easily one of the spookiest 30 seconds on film.

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What else. Last night I rented "Lolita" from BB. I love Jeremy Irons, but I'm convinced he can't have a normal sex life:

• "Dead Ringers." Ugh. The most disturbing film I have ever watched, and I've watched "Evil Dead," "Mrs. Doubtfire," and "The Cook the Thief His Wife and Her Lover."
• "Damage." Everyone tells me the novel was dreadful, but I liked it. Any cinematization of it can't improve on the despair and violence of the main characters' sex lives.
• "Bridehead Revisited." Sebastian doesn't become a monk; he just sponges off them and is himself a sponge for drink. Jeremy Irons's character, whose name I forget, falls in love with Sebastian's sister as a Sebastian-substitute. Forget the homosexual-manqué, that's just plain incest.
• "The French Lieutenant's Woman." I don't know if the movie gives as many possible endings as the novel, but a) he's Victorian and b) she's got him strung out.
• "M. Butterfly." Again, I've only read the play, not seen the movie, but Gallimard can't tell a man's anus from a woman's vagina in print, on stage, or on film (or so he claimed in person).
• "Waterland." His childhood love gets pregnant and against her abortionist's direct orders, he looks at what's in the bucket before he dumps it. The abortionist is a witch who lives in the fens and her methods result in septicemia and sterility, and both Irons and the girl are psychologically scarred for life.
• "Kafka." Like "Brazil," this is surreal and twisted, a favorite. An excellent meld of Kafka's life, "The Trial," and "The Castle." I don't remember if there's a woman in it.
• "Lolita." 'Nuff said.

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RDC is sure my waist is more pronounced. I know my arms are bigger and I'm sure my posture's improved, but I've yet to see any difference in my tush. It's a lovely day, sunny, windy, and, thankfully, cooler again, though not as cold as February ought to be (it rained in Fargo this week), so I should go for a walk. Right now I'm pretending this headache is debilitating, though I know perfectly well a walk would help. I'm glad I didn't have this headache last night, or RDC might not have had occasion to determine that my waistline is shrinking.

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I wrote to medievalist RJH and the punning Charenton family last night:

I am reading a biography of Eleanor of Aquitaine by Alison Weir, whose scholarship is iffy but who weaves a good enough tale for my amusement.

She writes about how Geoffrey of Anjou (Henry II's father) got to be known as Plantagenet because of the sprig of bloom flower (Latin: planta genista) he wore in his hat. I knew that, probably thanks to you, RJH, but it had long passed from my forebrain. Anyway, I was reading that on the bus coming home and I thought, "Well, that explains how Henry was able to sweep away his rivals."

Also, about all these new state quarters. DEDBG, have you heard that the U.S. is issuing all these new quarters, that each of the states gets to design the reverse (with a kinder, gentler Geo. W on the obverse), and they're coming out five a year for 10 years? Anyway, of the six that've come out so far, four have revolutionary themes. This makes sense, since of course they each were one of the 13 colonies. But I'm thinking that though Connecticut might be excused for resting on its laurels, haven't the others done anything in the past 200 years that they'd like to commemorate?

I told that to RDC, and he protested that the Connecticut quarter has the Charter Oak on it, so what did I mean? He'd forgotten that the state flower is the mountain laurel.

But me, I slay me.

At least I get all my own jokes.

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Oh, and when I said that all my friends slacking off because no one's been pregnant for six months, for the first time in five years, I was forgetting about NML and his wife. He grew up with all my best college buds, escaped temporarily to Syracuse University, but transferred to UConn to finish up with us. I'm fond of NML particularly because he was one of the few first EOS people I met who liked me--everyone else hated me for my big ol' monster crush on SEM. NML didn't know about that because he was only home from SU for a weekend when I met him at a party. We're not bestest pals in frequent touch, though, which is why I forgot.

But anyway, someone else has picked up the slack (which is good, because NML's wife is due in less than two weeks). The Vs, of course; they're working on number 4. They believe what they believe, which is not what I believe, but I'm glad that if there's anyone who doesn't believe in contraceptives, it's MJV and DMV. They're loving and enthusiastic parents whose children to date are charming, fun, loving, and well-mannered. This one arrives in December.

There's a knock at the door.